Talisman
by Vicktur
Summary: He was finally a step closer in finding a cure for the disease. The disease that took Hayato's mother and will soon take Hayato. He couldn't give up the chance. If it meant leaving Hayato behind to give him 80 more years in his lifespan, Shamal would have not wasted a second.


**The Seal of Hope**

* * *

Shamal walked through the corridors. His heavy and urgent footsteps alone made people move out of his way. He clutched papers in his hands dearly, as if they held the key to a brighter future. And they did.

In his hands were a possible solution to the cure.

He should have looked at the warning signs with more caution. When Hayato picked up smoking from his father, he should have intervened and said 'no'. Yet, he allowed him because Hayato wasn't a child anymore.

The second warning was when Hayato entered the mafia world Shamal desperately wanted to shield him from. He knew it was inevitable seeing how set Hayato was on joining a family. So Shamal spread the news around the mafia world that Hayato wasn't a pure Italian. This worked for a few years until he met the Vongola heir.

The mafia world wasn't some walk in a park. It was stressful. It was what took Hayato's mother. And he wasn't set on failing to keep his promise with her.

_Please save my son._

The third warning was when Hayato failed to appear during a weapon malfunction. The 10 Year Bazooka exploded, sending everyone in the room as their future selves; yet Hayato was the only one who wasn't there. When Reborn notified Shamal of this, Shamal foolishly convinced himself that maybe the future Hayato was sent somewhere else and dismissed the idea that the child he cared for was dead at such a young age.

Shamal crumpled the paper in his hands when his hands tightened with anxiety.

It wasn't fair. He's only 19.

* * *

"Shamal!" A young Hayato ran towards his doctor, wrapping his arms around the doctor's legs tightly. "You came back from your sister's place!"

The doctor reached down and lifted Hayato to his eye level with a smile. "Nice to see you as well Hayato! You've grown taller since I last saw you!" Shamal said as he held Hayato in his arms.

Hayato beamed. "I ate everything on my plate since you told me! Look!" Hayato pointed to his hair.

Shamal laughed. "You have my hairstyle! It looks better on you Hayato."

Hayato's smile trailed off as he wrapped his arms around Shamal's neck and buried his face on his shoulder. "I missed you a lot. I really did."

Shamal could hear the faint tone of sadness in Hayato's voice. Shamal smiled softly as he patted Hayato's back. "Go ahead and cry Hayato. No one is watching."

Soon, Shamal felt his shoulder becoming wet as Hayato quietly sobbed. Shamal had only gone off for a week and Hayato was crying as if he had left for a year.

* * *

He still could remember when he found Hayato in Japan. Shamal had searched everywhere for the runaway boy after his own father gave up on searching for him. Shamal counted his blessings when he was forced to hide out in Japan after flirting with the Queen of England. It couldn't be just coincidence that he would run into the same kid he was searching for.

When Shamal saw the cigarette on Hayato's hands, he felt his anger rise. And when he scolded Hayato for smoking, Hayato replied back coldly:

"You have no right to suddenly care for me when you left me without a warning and never came back."

Shamal couldn't think of a reply that time because he was right. He was finally a step closer in finding a cure for the disease. The disease that took Hayato's mother and will soon take Hayato. He couldn't give up the chance. If it meant leaving Hayato behind to give him 80 more years in his lifespan, Shamal would have not wasted a second. And he didn't. He went to Russia as soon as he got the call and stayed there for 7 years, researching. But there wasn't a single night he didn't think of Hayato. He knew how heart broken the kid must have been and the guilt haunted him for many months. But he wanted the best for him.

And when the cure failed to answer all the questions, Shamal fell into depression. The solution he and his peers worked on feverishly for years failed to make their dreams come true. It was devastating for Shamal. All those years wasted. Wasted trying to find a cure. Shamal disappeared from his office in Russia and drank his way to the Queen of England. And in the next sober moment, he found himself running for his life, all the way to Japan.

All the way back to Hayato.

* * *

"This is a talisman Hayato," Shamal said, holding a wooden circular ornament in his hand. It was tied to a string and had a picture of the sun on it. Young Hayato looked at it with most fascination.

"What does it do?" he asked.

"It holds the power to heal you," Shamal replied, handing the wooden artifact to the child. "Pretty cool huh?"

"No way!" Hayato protested after examining it. "It's just a piece of wood!"

Shamal laughed. "It's the power inside the wood that makes it great, kid." He closed Hayato's hands around the talisman. "Keep it with you all right? This will protect you from harm."

"What? But I already have bodyguards for that."

Shamal smiled. "Then keep it for me. Promise me you'll take it with you everywhere you'll go."

Hayato flashed a large smile. "Only if you'll teach me how to control your bugs!"

Shamal held out his pinkie finger. "How about I teach you something cooler than that?"

Hayato's beaming smile revealed a toothy grin. "Deal!"

* * *

Shamal wanted to tell Hayato the truth when they were finally reunited. Even if it meant Hayato was going to hate him for not telling him sooner. But Shamal didn't want to. Because he didn't want Hayato to know that he was never going to reach the age 20. He didn't want the boy to know that he was going to die before he could even have a life.

Shamal still held hope that he was going to save him. He promised his mother that he will and by the gods, he will do whatever it takes to keep that promise.

* * *

"What the talisman?" the 17 year old Hayato scoffed. "I threw it away long ago old man."

Shamal hid his hurt expression with a weak smile. "Hahaha, I see."

Hayato gave him a brief look, feeling sort of guilty. "Come on Shamal, you seriously can't expect me to believe in that bullshit you fed me long ago. I mean...come on," Hayato sighed. "I don't believe in magic. Science, yes but not magic."

Shamal smirked. "I guess you are right. You've grown Hayato."

Hayato smirked back. "Did you just realize that old man? Face it, by the time you know it, I'll be in my thirties with kids."

Shamal chuckled in reply as the guilt inside him heavily settled in.

* * *

Shamal entered his office. The crumpled paper in his hands spilled on his desk and Shamal hurried to get his supplies. He pulled out books, brought out flasks, put on his gloves, and flattened out the crumpled papers.

He could hear nurses outside running in and out of the room besides his office. His heart was pounding. He was desperate. So desperate to find the answer he was so dead set on finding. His hands shook as he tried to calm himself. But as soon as he heard a painful cough next door, his heart started to race again. Shamal closed his eyes and mustered all the strength within him to concentrate. But how could he? When inside the room next to his office was Hayato struggling to cling onto life?

Shamal's fear took him to a painful memory of the past, when he first saw the symptoms of the disease within Hayato.

He could remember the moment so clearly. His mind showed him the shuddering body of the silverette on the floor. Shamal saw Hayato glancing up at him, his teeth and lips stained with blood.

"Shamal..." he breathed.

Shamal had resisted the urge to smack the boy right there and then. He had told him, countless times before, to stop smoking yet the foolish teenager continued behind his back. Now it was too late.

Shamal clenched his fists as he tried to get rid of the vile memory.

Maybe if Shamal had told him about his disease, maybe Hayato wouldn't have smoked. Maybe he would have eaten healthier and avoided the mafia.

The nicotine within Hayato's blood accelerated the disease, making it even more difficult to control. Over the years, Shamal got his mosquitoes to take small samples of Hayato's blood and the results continued to get worse. They never got better. Not even once. Shamal grew restless during those years. He grew frustrated. He was always up and going, trying to figure out the answer to a question that didn't have an ending.

But now, he had it. The papers on his desk were from his peers in Russia who never stopped researching even after he had given up. And they had finally found a compatible virus that was strong enough to fight off Hayato's disease. Granted, the virus would make Hayato sick as well but it was more stable and easier to control. They had already tested the results on another patient who suffered the same disease.

And he lived.

Shamal took a deep breath and started creating the medicine. He glanced over the notes time to time and never stopped to take a breather.

* * *

"So are you keeping the talisman I gave you Hayato?" Shamal asked.

The two were oustide the estate, enjoying the sunny summer day.

"Yup!" Young Hayato said cheerfully. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the wooden ornament. "See! I have it with me all the time!"

Shamal chuckled. "I'm glad to hear it. So, did it protect you from anything?"

Hayato pondered for a moment. "There was this one time where I was playing in the field and this big bee came right at me!"

"Oh really?" Shamal asked in an amused tone. He was glad that Hayato did not realize it wasn't just the mosquitoes and beetles he could control.

"Yeah! And so I ran but the stupid bug kept coming at me!"

"What a nasty little bee. So what did you do?" Shamal said wrinkling his nose.

"I got my talisman and pulled it out on him! And then you know what happened?" Hayato asked enthusiastically, not being able to contain his excitement.

"No, what happened?" Shamal asked innocently.

"The talisman drove the bee away!" Hayato shouted, throwing his hands up in the air. "How cool was that?! The thing actually works Shamal!"

Shamal laughed. "Of course it does. If it didn't, why would I give it to you Hayato?"

Hayato pouted. "I thought you were playing a trick on me! You always do!"

Shamal ruffed the kid's hair affectionately. "Well are you glad that this time it wasn't?"

Hayato grinned as he nodded. He suddenly gasped in delight. "Do you think this will stop bullets?"

Shamal laughed as he shook his head. "I wouldn't test that out Hayato. But if one does manage to get you...what do you do?"

"I come to you!" Hayato said with a beaming smile. "And you'll patch me up!"

Shamal smiled warmly as he placed a hand on Hayato's head. "That's right. Whatever happens to you, I will be here. And I will take very good care of you."

Hayato held out his pinkie finger. "Promise?"

Shamal wrapped his finger with Hayato's. "Promise."

* * *

Shamal stared at the vial in front of him. He did it. He created the cure. He gazed at the vial in his hand. His heart pounded against his chest. He could save Hayato now.

_Hayato..._

Shamal quickly entered the next room where Hayato was residing. He saw a nurse change his bloodied mouthpiece to a clean one. Shamal's eyes were fixated on the waste basket full of bloodied mouthpiece. Hayato was close to meeting his maker.

"Nurse," Shamal called. His tone was rasphy and tired. He cleared his throat. "Please clear the room for me."

The nurse nodded and quickly left, closing the door behind her. Shamal was now alone with Hayato. Hayato's soft breathing and the sound of his heart monitor echoed throughout the room, drowning out Shamal's frantic heartbeats. Shamal got to his side and gently moved the silver locks from his face. "I'm here Hayato," Shamal whispered.

Shamal took a syringe and took a full dose from the vial. He tapped on the needle to get rid of any air bubbles and stared at Hayato's face once more. The boy's face was deathly pale and tiny sweat bullets soaked his skin.

Hayato suffered long enough. The disease crippled him two months ago and ever since that day, he was confined to the hospital bed, stuck in agonizing pain. Shamal too, suffered long enough. The sleepless nights besides Hayato, watching him sleep, wiping the sweat away, and holding his hand whenever Hayato was in pain...it was now over. It was now finally over. The nightmare was done.

Shamal injected the liquid into the IV. He felt his heart was slowing down to a normal beat. He felt less tense and felt at ease as Hayato's pained expression finally left his face. With a sigh, Hayato's face relaxed.

Shamal glanced at his heart monitor.

There was no beat.

* * *

Hayato glanced at his doctor with a sad face. Summer with his doctor was over and it was time to return to his dorm school.

"I-I'm going to miss you Shamal..." Hayato stammered, struggling to keep his sobbing quiet.

Shamal went down on one knee and patted Hayato on his shoulder. "Don't cry now Hayato. Did you already forget what we promised last night?"

"That I wouldn't cry..."

"Yes. Now be strong for me, okay?"

Hayato nodded. But the 7 year old still could not hold his grief back from not being able to see his doctor for many months.

With a sigh, Shamal smiled. "Here, give me the talisman I gave you."

"Huh? Why?"

"I'll show you something. I will enchant your talisman so that it will always find its way back to me. Just hold onto that talisman and we will meet one day."

"Really? Can you really do that Shamal?"

"Sure I can. Here, Abracadabra! Help Hayato find his way back to me!"

"Did it work?!"

"Yes! It was successful. Now when ever want to see me again, just whisper into the talisman that you want to see me. And it will bring you to me!"

"That's so cool! Thanks...dad."

Shamal blushed madly at the word. He quickly spun around to see if anyone heard it. Thankfully no one did. Shamal grasped Hayato's shoulders. "No...No Hayato. Don't ever call me that..." Shamal said, struggling to keep his embarrassment down. "I'm not your dad. Your dad is right behind us."

Hayato looked down. "I know...Sometimes, I wish you were my dad." Hayato gave Shamal a painful smile. Shamal felt his heart shatter when he recognized that smile. It was the same smile a girl gave him when he broke up with her. She wanted to be with him but Shamal refused to stay with her. It was the smile that accepted rejection.

Shamal loved Hayato like his son. But Hayato already had a father in his life. It would be wrong of him to take that away from Hayato's father, even if that man has never been around Hayato.

"I'm just your doctor Hayato. Remember that," Shamal said.

With a final pat, Shamal rose up and hid his face away from Hayato, which was filled with pain. Hayato dropped his head, crestfallen. He turned towards the car when suddenly he heard Shamal call out his name. Hayato turned around to see Shamal smiling at him.

"Remember, if you ever want to see me, just hold onto your talisman. And I'll come to you in no time."

Hayato smiled back. "I'll never lose it."

* * *

"Hayato?" Shamal called out. His body was frozen in fear as he looked at the still body of his student. Shamal touched Hayato's wrist, feeling for the blood pumping in his veins-he found nothing. He quickly pressed his ear on his chest-no heartbeat. Shamal opened Hayato's eyes and put a light over his pupils-no reaction. Shamal's hands started to shake. He shook the heart monitor, thinking it was broken; in a last attempt to deceive himself once again. When the continuous beep wouldn't stop, Shamal threw the machine on the floor in frustration.

His eyes kept staring at Hayato's still body. His mind screamed at him to do something. Shamal's hands became clumsy, trying to reach for something on the nearby medicine cabinet but never grabbing anything. 13 years of medical school and he had no idea what to do.

Shamal reached for Hayato's arm to check his pulse again._ Stop it, you know he's dead._ He ignored the voice in his head and checked the wrist with his fingers pressed firmly to the veins. No pulse. In panic mode, Shamal ripped off all the IVs and threw off the blanket off Hayato's body. He placed both his hands on the boy's bare chest and started pumping. _Stop. What you are doing._ 'No. I won't. I can't.' Shamal started to pump faster._ What you are doing is wrong. You need to stop._ 'Never. He's not dead.' _Sto-_

"He's not dead!"

Shamal grabbed Hayato's other hand to check to pulse but suddenly stopped. His eyes widened at the object clamped inside the fingers.

It was the talisman.

Shamal felt his body weaken as he stared into the talisman. His heart stopped beating for a split second and his chest suffocated. He touched the talisman with shaky hands, unable to comprehend what he is seeing. Was it real? Was he hallucinating?

Shamal touched the wooden carvings on the talisman. It was real.

He kept it. He really kept it.

Those years of Hayato chiding that he lost the talisman or had it destroyed...it was a lie?

Shamal buried his head on the bed, holding Hayato's hand tenderly. His muffled sobs echoed in the empty, silent room.

* * *

"I'm sorry my friend. But it was the humane thing to do. There is no cure for this disease. We lied to you so you will end his...your suffering."

Shamal hung up. So it was true. His peers could not find a cure. So out of mercy, they sent him poison that would kill Hayato. Because they knew Shamal will never rest until Hayato was cured. They did it for him and Hayato.

Shamal dropped the phone on his desk. He didn't know what to think of their actions. Was it really their choice to end Hayato's life like that? Who did they think they were to decide that? But at the same time, Shamal knew he was the same as them. He forced Hayato to fight it, even when Hayato was too far deep in pain to even talk anymore. He too, was just as guilty as them. Maybe Hayato wanted death. But now, he'll never know.

Shamal held the talisman in his other hand and clasped it tightly. He brought it over his face and fought back the tears.

He couldn't do anything in the end. Once again.

He failed.

* * *

Hayato's funeral was quiet and small, just like he would have wanted. Only the closest friends and family attended. There were quiet sobbing throughout the ceremony. Uri curled up in front of Hayato's casket and refused to leave to the end. She was finally persuaded to leave by Bianchi. Bianchi, of course, took it the hardest of all people. After all, she was his sister. Shamal didn't know what to say to her. He felt like it was his fault that Hayato died. So he just kept his distance from her and stood quietly as she endured the pain with Reborn by her side.

When the ceremony was completed, each of the attendant walked over to the open casket and bid their separate farewells. Some were emotional and heart wrenching; and some were quiet and reserved. Tsuna took the longest to say his farewells. He clasped his hand over Hayato's folded hands and stood still for a good moment, until he finally let go and returned to his seat.

It was now Shamal's turn to go up. At first, Shamal stood in front of Hayato's casket wondering what to do, what to say to the boy he failed. Without saying anything, too afraid that he would lose his composure, Shamal placed the talisman on Hayato's hands. With a brief and final look and a whisper of _I'm sorry_, he turned away as the men closed the casket.

He took his seat next to Yamamoto who happened to be there. "I recognize that talisman," Yamamoto started. Shamal glanced at him. Yamamoto held a sad smile on his face. "Hayato used to carry it with him everywhere. One day, I finally got him to tell me what it was for. He said he was carrying it to summon somone. I always thought he was searching for a U.M.A. But now I realize...he was looking for you."

Shamal only turned away.

Long after the burial ceremony was over, all that was left was Reborn and Shamal. The two stood side by side in front of the grave that was surrounded by white roses. They were silent and never glanced at each other. The two were fixated on the tombstone in front of them.

"It's not your fault."

Shamal didn't glance at Reborn. Reborn didn't either but continued to speak.

"He knew you were trying hard to save him. That's why he fought it to the end."

"And I've failed him," Shamal said bitterly. His fists clenched tightly. "Just like his mother" His words were full of pain and remorse.

Reborn looked at Shamal. "Shamal. You've done everything you could have done. It was only a matter of time before he died. His disease is something that exceeds all of our medical intelligence. It would have taken a century to figure out the cure. But you still took the chance. For years you studied and never gave up searching for his cure."

Reborn placed a hand gently on Shamal's shoulder. "You've done all you could do. Now it's time to let him go. He would have wanted this."

Shamal lowered his head. Reborn dropped his hand from Shamal's shoulder.

"Go and let it all out. No one is here to see."

Shamal broke down.

* * *

It had been a month since Hayato's death. Everyone in Vongola gradually settled back to their normal lives, including Shamal. The work kept him busy so he hardly had the time to think about Hayato. It was still too painful for him to think about. When there was free time, he did other things instead. He went out with friends, dated women, and watched terrible shows. It was all to avoid the painful reminder of the loss.

Shamal stuffed the last of his books inside his suitcase. Today, he was packing up his belongings to return to Russia to continue searching for the cure. Shamal and his colleagues were finally making progress after one of his peers found a new type of insect that held antibodies in India. Shamal had wasted no time dissecting the insect and extracting the antibodies. He was now to return to Russia with the new discovery.

Shamal felt a smile on his face. He still felt the painful guilt of Hayato's death. No matter how many good days he had, the guilt would always ruin them. But he didn't mind it. It helped him to become persistent in finding a cure to save future lives. If anything, Hayato's death gave him more ambition.

He opened the door to leave and stepped on a small packaged item. Shamal opened it without hesitation, thinking that it was the medical journals from his colleagues he asked for. But when he opened it, all there was inside was a worn out ornament.

Shamal's eyes widened.

It was the talisman that was supposed to be buried with Hayato's body.

Shamal quickly retrieved the box and looked around for a return address and found none. Shamal was left standing with the talisman in his hand. It was exactly identical to the one he gave Hayato. It had the scratch marks from when Hayato dropped it constantly and had the little chipped mark when Hayato threw it at Shamal one day when Shamal left him for two whole weeks without saying anything. He looked at it, his heart slowly filling with bittersweet memories of the past.

After a moment, Shamal smiled. He held the talisman close to his heart. The painful guilt within his heart vanished without a trace.

"You found your way back Hayato. Good job."

* * *

**AN**: This was a really old fic that I had. I forgot to upload it. I have always admired Shamal and Hayato's relationship and I hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
